How To Have Better Luck This Month / Year

Well as the New Year is upon us, many will be reflecting on the past and thinking about their hopes for the future.  Too many people will be looking back and thinking what they didn’t achieve, do or make happen last year and feel disappointed.

It is all a matter of perspective though. Do you really want to think about what went ‘wrong’!?

What if you focus on what you DID achieve, do and make happen?
Wouldn’t you then be grateful for everything instead…

This is something that Dr John Demartini posted that you should read carefully and meditate upon.

“As you reflect on 2015, think about what you have accomplished during the course of this year. It is wise to think of what you have achieved in the different areas of your life.
dr-john-demartini-reflect-achievements
Exercise:
1. Spiritually what have you achieved?
2. Vocationally what have you achieved?
3. Mentally what have you achieved?
4. Financially what have you achieved?
5. Familial what have you achieved?
6. Physically what have you achieved?
7. Socially what have you achieved?”

Do you now see how successful your year actually was? The great things that DID happen and achievements that make you happy when you think about them.

Let’s talk about NOW! Note how this post is title “How To Have Better Luck THIS Month”
People tend to make plans for the future, then when it is time to do something, they fail to take the right actions. How familiar does this sound… “Tomorrow (next week/month) I will do X”?
I used to be a first class procrastinator, so I know from experience. How does “Now I will do X” feel?

Also ‘luck’ is a completely different subject which I’ll cover another time – for now you’ll just have to create it with some decisions, commitment and a little work.

Instead, ask yourself if what you are ask-yourselfdoing today is getting you closer to where you want to be tomorrow. The actions don’t have to be huge or drastic, they just need to be in alignment with what you really want.

Of course it’s good to make plans for the future to know where you’re going but you need to take the right steps regularly as well.  So if there is something you want to achieve, why not START today…

Let’s look at 3 areas that people are usually concerned about and the language they use.

– Health
– “I want to lose weight” or “I want to get fit”
Is that what they really mean? Do they believe if they lose x lbs/kgs they will be happier?
Do they see ‘fit’ as the (fake) or extremely ‘perfect’ people on TV and magazines?
Maybe thinking about it as “I want to be healthy” would be better…
This way the focus is on a healthy lifestyle and if you’re overweight, your body knows what it’s ideal weight is (not a ‘right’ weight from a textbook) and will get back there, as long as you work with it, instead of eating crap food and excess calories for the sake of it.

– How about… “I want to quit drinking” or “I want to stop eating so much junk food”
This time it is about stopping something, which is probably now a habit on auto-pilot. Society, family and you have trained yourself to make this something that you just do without even thinking most of the time.
It’s simple to make the decision not to eat the wrong foods – but it isn’t necessarily easy when that’s what you’re used to. Also the habit needs to be replaced with something else, something that is beneficial and will do you good.

Maybe rephrase it as “I want to start drinking more water and fresh juice” and “I want to eat healthier foods”.   When you’ve decided this is what you want to do instead, commit to it!
Don’t say “I’ll just finish this off first though.”  Take action and either give away the alcohol (to friends) and fizzy drinks, biscuits and other poor food choices, lying around the kitchen, to a charity. Or simply pour it down the sink and throw it in the bin. You don’t have to finish it (as you eating it won’t benefit those ‘starving people’ with any twisted logic or justification you can dream up.)

Remember you’ve not started on your new path until you’re moving off the old one.
You can eat crap sometimes later, if you want – but give yourself a fighting chance by avoiding it altogether for at least a couple of weeks!
When I stopped drinking around 8 years ago, I used to go out with my student and work friends 3-4 times a week.  During my first 2 weeks of tee-total (and vegetarian) they tested me and gave me so much grief and pressure to conform to my (their) old habits. But I persevered and won and felt better for it. I do occasionally drink now and eat meat but the difference is that I don’t need to and it doesn’t control my food choices.  I committed and stuck with my plan, regardless of outside temptations. It was a test of will-power but you CAN do whatever it is that you really want to achieve.

– Wealth
– “I want to make more money”
Will making more money make you happier? Will it ease your financial burdens or will you just spend more on stuff that you don’t really need?
Maybe say “I want to utilise money smarter”. This could mean looking at your expenditure and reducing any waste. Cancel the Direct Debits for subscriptions you don’t need or use that much. Find a cheaper insurance company and utility supplier.  Don’t waste as much money on crap you don’t need but just wanted one day.  You’ll find you’ll end up with more money.
Of course you can also look at ways to make more money as well – but if you’ve not reduced your costs where you can save it today – you may find your bad habits spend/waste any extra you would earn as well.

– Relationships
– “I need to find a partner who will love me.”
Do you really need someone else to be loved? Of course it’s great to be appreciated by others but if you have low self-worth, lack confidence and don’t really love yourself, finding a partner to fill that gap will only be a temporary fix.
How about a mantra of “I am worthy of love” and “I am enough as I am”
“I am going to be more confident” – find out how you can be more confident in life and happy being with yourself. You will then also become more attractive to others, as they will see you are love and happy – and who doesn’t like to be around those kinds of people!? You know when you’re around someone like this as you feel good about yourself too.  You don’t need someone else to be love – but once you find love within yourself, you will find it around you too.
(Of course this is a deeper topic, I just wanted to touch upon it here to give you another perspective if you’d not considered it before).

How could you rephrase what you think about these areas and others that you want to see improvements in?  Can you change the words you use, so they make more sense, have more impact and are easier to achieve?

Once you’ve done that, you also need to get started on making things happen.

– Commitment
First you need to decide your new goals that you want to take action and make a commitment to actually DO things differently.  To tell people publicly is a sign to show the world that you are actually serious about the new cause and activities you are going to embark upon.
This leads into the next step…

– Accountability
After deciding and committing to a course of action, you need to make sure you actually do it and take steps towards your goals. You can reach your goals without this but what better way than for someone to ask you regularly how you are getting on?
To be held accountable, tell a friend (who won’t let you off easily) and trusts that you will do what you say. They will keep you on track and support you in making sure you honour your word (commitment).

– Honesty

You have to be honest with yourself and your accountability partner.
What do you have to gain by lying to yourself about what you want or are prepared to do? If your heart isn’t in it, simply don’t commit to it. You’ll only end up feeling bad when you don’t do what you said you would.
Also why lie to someone who you’ve asked to help you stay on track.  The whole point of accountability is to be held responsible to your commitments.

If you’re unable or unwilling to be honest, then this is something you really need to work on.
Too many people, lie too often and think it is inconsequential. It is not!
Your character is built on what you say, mean and is true.
Actions speak louder than words anyway – and if you lie, you will not be congruent and out of alignment with yourself and life.  Don’t live a fraudulent life but an honest one.
Maybe this could be the one thing that makes you luckier and changes your life drastically this year?

Now you may need need some new strategies to achieve the goals you’ve committed to.
You might already have strategies to get to your goals.
Ask yourself, have they worked for you in the past?
Do you believe they are the only way to do it?
Some people are only interested in doing things ‘their way’ and what they already know. They don’t like to find out more or do things a different way. Others don’t like to ask for help or accept it – they’d rather remain ‘stuck’ than do and get what they say they really want.

Why not find someone who has the results you want and ask them how they achieved it.
Wouldn’t it be simpler to do it by following their strategies?
Seek out a coach or mentor. There are people that love to help others, as it makes them feel good about themselves, valued and they are also making your life better and the world a better place.
You just have to be vulnerable, share your challenges and ASK for help.

Joining the gym in January and quitting in February might not be working for you.
Getting a personal trainer instead, to hold you accountable as well, would be a better solution.

Of course if you decide what you said you wanted to do changes – or you don’t want to do it anymore, then that’s OK too. It’s not failure if you decide you want to do something else instead or you don’t really value what you thought you did. Other things might be more important to you and trying something new will show you what you do and don’t value in life.

Remember change is simple, although it might not always be easy.
You know what you want to do, the next step is doing it consistently.

Take The Correct Actions AND Do Them Often To Create New Beneficial Habits!

I’ve coached and worked with people and entrepreneurs, who started off on one path but then decided they didn’t want to continue, it was too much hard work or they wanted to do something else instead.
That’s fine! It’s your life and you can do whatever you want to. No-one should decide your goals or force you to do something you really don’t want to. Of course sometimes it’s worth persevering but it’s always YOUR choice!  People should love you and accept you as you are!

Send me a message to let me know what you’re committing to and I’ll even check in regularly to see how you’re getting along if you want. It doesn’t matter what area of your life you want to improve, it always helps to have someone supportive hold you accountable to doing what you say.

Well this was a stream of consciousness that I typed up, then tried to structure so it was easy to read. Forgive me if I go off on tangents – if you know me though, I usually do but everything has a point in the end!

I hope this has been useful and if you want to make a public commitment to do something, then do so.  Post it on Facebook/Twitter and tell people that you know.  Or send me a message if I can support you in any other way.

Let’s make this day/week/month/year a most excellent one!

House prices at all time highs – what next?

Do you believe in market cycles and that forecasts can be accurate?

Take a look at the following chart from economist Martin Armstrong who has been predicting these things for Governments and Banks for a long time.

realestate-cycle (Source: Martin Armstrong, see below)

Also note that the average UK house prices overtook the pre-crash record for the first time recently and US home sales also reached eight year peak and prices all time high. (sources below)

Many people may have forgotten what happened when the prices were this high last time and in a bubble just 7-8 years ago.

The inevitable crash was postponed/minimised by Government intervention and keeping dishonest bankers in business. Politicians supported their friends at the Banks with taxpayer money, so they could continue to launder for criminals, charge excessive fees, rig interest rates in their own favour, pay big bonuses and all the other fraud that has been going on and continues.

This money has flowed away from the ‘people’ and into the stock market, corporations and CEO pockets. The FED didn’t raise interest rates as they probably want a good Christmas of spending from people and enough time to fill their boots.

Politicians have been giving themselves pay rises, whilst the public coffers have been emptied.
Banks don’t have enough real assets to cover all the money they gamble with and pay their ‘top’ employees.
Governments all over the world are in debt and many take out new lines of credit, to try and pay the interest on their previous borrowing. Eventually this will stop.
The race is on between America and a European country to finally admit it can’t pay it’s debts.

On top of that, the wars and instability being caused is creating mass migration of people looking for a better way of life. So when ‘immigrants’ turn up expecting a little help, everyone forgets how well off they have been in the past and the fact they are also ‘children’ of migrants themselves.
These poor people have seen the media and ‘adverts’ stating America and Western Europe are the richest and best places to live in the world, especially as they have accumulated so many of the worlds resources over the decades/centuries.
(See the TV and movies that sell you the ideal lifestyle, as opposed to the News which is designed to keep you in fear and looking for answers/protection from the Govt.)

OK, I think I’m ranting now so let’s get back on track.

So what is likely to happen next?

The bankrupt Governments can’t continue printing money at these rates to put into the stock market and interest rates only have one direction to move. When that happens and the markets contract, the stock market bubble and property (real estate) bubble will deflate as well.

My guess is that there is about 1 year (maximum) to get your investments in order and get ready to stick it out for the long term. The first signs will be from America or a defaulting European country in the next few months before it goes mainstream.

What can you do to hedge yourselves against it happening?

– Sell any properties that are highly leveraged right NOW, which are bringing in a low yield.
When interest rates increase and prices drop, these are the ones that will suck your cashflow and reserves dry.

– Don’t buy house for the sake of growing your portfolio (or because you want to move to a new house), only invest for yield with bigger deposits than you would normally want to put down.

– Leverage can work in your favour in an up trending market but it is even more dangerous in a down market.

– Speculators and those investing in new build, big blocks and the new bubble of student accommodation will likely be hit worse.

– Pay down as much as you can on your principle residence.

– Property and business is once again going to become about the long term sustainability as opposed to short term and quick returns.

I learned my lessons the hard way from experience 7/8 years ago. Fortunately I don’t have to repeat it this time. Will you learn from past experience or is another rude awakening required?

The good news is property will become more affordable for people to buy their own homes and there will be the opportunity to buy businesses based on income and yield, instead of simply speculating with borrowed money.

More information here:
http://www.economicconfidencemodels.com/
http://www.theguardian.com/money/2015/jul/28/house-prices-in-england-and-wales-hit-record-high
http://www.propertywire.com/news/europe/us-existing-home-index-2015072310783.html

Hit The Reset – UPW Power Walk

Tony-UPW-Zombie-Nation

You ever get that feeling where things aren’t going to plan, you’re feeling tired and sluggish or you just need to hit the reset?

I’ve just started to walk more whilst listening to my mp3 player and the following track is AMAZING! (or Amaze-Balls as youngsters call it these days)

Playing Zombie Nation on continuous loop and going for a Power Walk will hit the reset and definitely get you charged up again ready to get back to what it is you need to do.

With a smile on your face and a spring in your step, people in the street will think you’re on a mission – heck, even YOU will believe your body is taking you on a mission!

WARNING: The power walk may turn into a run or even a dance-walk, with you chanting or mouthing “Woah Oh Oh Ohh…”  UPW’ers will know what I’m talking about with all those positive anchored feelings.Anyway give it a go and let me know what you think.

Does it clear your mind, give you more energy and make you feel ‘Tony The Tiger’ GRRR-E-A-T?
This one goes out to my UPW family and mia famiglia Italiana!

You can paste the youtube link into http://www.youtube-mp3.org/ and download the mp3 😉
This post is 100% Tony Certified and Approved!

Life Captured In A Brief Moment In Time

ulay-ohIn case you’ve forgotten what life is about and you no longer have ‘time’ to do the things that you want and to meet people you say you care about, just take a brief moment in time, to watch this short video that will put it all into perspective. It will be over as quickly as it started but give you a memory that will hopefully stay with you for a very long time.

Haunting and beautiful, honest and true…  I promise you that if you still ‘feel’ something alive inside, that this will bring a tear to your eye.  You can read about it below afterwards as the words are not what is important or of value – but the experience and feeling.

When was the last time you sat in silence with someone and were fully present?

Bobby x

During 2010, the Museum of Modern Art held a major retrospective and performance recreation of Abramović’s work, the biggest exhibition of performance art in MoMA’s history. During the run of the exhibition, Marina Abramović performed The Artist Is Present, a 736-hour and 30-minute static, silent piece, in which she sat immobile in the museum’s atrium while spectators were invited to take turns sitting opposite her.

Many people showed up, but her response to one person in particular encapsulates it all.  Her former lover for many years sits down across from her. Marina and Ulay broke up more than 30 years ago and this is the first time that they have seen each other again since then.

—–

“I was fortunate enough to wander into the MoMA just in time for “The Artist Is Present”. Equal parts unsettling, absurd, and profound; I couldn’t shake the experience. Later, I stumbled onto the video wherein Ulay and Marina reunite and was overwhelmed with only one sentiment: this is a song.” – Jon Burr

Not long after this sentiment was realized, was it brought to life in the form of “Ulay, Oh” – the second single off their forthcoming EP Adonis

Relationship Aren’t Always Easy – So Go The Movies

movie-heartApparently there are four things that kills relationships stone dead according to Professor John Gottman:
– repeated criticism
– lots of expressions of contempt (like sarcasm)
– being defensive
– stonewalling, which is where there is NO communication.

If you’re at the stage where it may not be working (and before you go to therapy or decide to quit), how about agreeing to watch a film together?
I’m not on about the usual ideal, ‘happy ending’, Hollywood blockbuster but something with maybe more substance, where you may learn something about people, relationships and yourself.

A new three-year study finds that divorce rates and break-ups were more than halved by watching movies about relationships and discussing them afterwards.

“You might not be able to get your husband into a couples group, especially when you are happy. But watching a movie together and having a discussion, that’s not so scary. It’s less pathologizing, less stigmatizing.” – Ronald Rogge (the study’s lead author)

After watching the film together, the couple then talk about certain aspects of it, that will reveal what they each think, areas of conflict, possible solutions to work on – and most importantly COMMUNICATION. As if you can talk about the problem, you are on your way to solving it.

Check out the video below and list of films and questions.

It may save your relationship or at least give you some good films to watch 🙂

Original Movie List from the Study

A Star Is Born (1954) Mr. Blandings Builds his Dreamhouse (1948)
Judy Garland and James Mason Cary Grant and Myrna Loy
Adam’s Rib (1949) My Favorite Wife (1940)
Spencer Tracy and Katharine Hepburn Irene Dunne and Cary Grant
Anna Karenina (2012) Nina Takes a Lover (1994)
Keira Knightley and Jude Law Laura San Giacomo and Paul Rhys
As Good as it Gets (1997) Nine Months (1995)
Jack Nicholson and Helen Hunt Hugh Grant and Julianne Moore
Barefoot in the Par (1967) On Golden Pond (1981)
Robert Redford and Jane Fonda Katharine Hepburn and Henry Fonda
Children of a Lesser God (1986) Pat and Mike (1952)
William Hurt and Marlee Matlin Spencer Tracy and Katharine Hepburn
Days of Wine and Roses (1962) Penny Serenade (1941)
Jack Lemmon and Lee Remick Cary Grant and Irene Dunne
Desk Set (1957) Phffft [Pfft!] (1954)
Spencer Tracy and Katharine Hepburn Judy Holliday and Jack Lemmon
Dying Young (1991) Red Firecracker, Green Firecracker (1994)
Julia Roberts and Campbell Scott Jing Ning and Gang Wu
Fools Rush In (1997) She’s Having a Baby (1988)
Matthew Perry and Salma Hayek Kevin Bacon and Elizabeth McGovern
Forget Paris (1995) Steel Magnolias (1989)
Billy Crystal and Debra Winger Shirley MacLaine and Olympia Dukakis
French Twist (1995) Terms of Endearment (1983)
Patrick Aubrée and Josiane Balasko Shirley MacLaine and Debra Winger
Funny Girl (1968) The Devil’s Advocate (1997)
Barbra Streisand and Omar Sharif Keanu Reeves and Al Pacino
Gone With the Wind (1939) The Egg and I (1947)
Clark Gable and Vivien Leigh Claudette Colbert and Fred MacMurray
Guess Who’s Coming to Dinner (1967) The Male Animal (1942)
Spencer Tracy and Sidney Poitier Henry Fonda and Olivia de Havilland
Hanover Street (1979) The Out of Towners (1970)
Harrison Ford and Lesley-Anne Down Jack Lemon and Sandy Dennis
Husbands and Wives (1992) The Thin Man (1934)
Woody Allen and Mia Farrow William Powell and Myrna Loy
Indecent Proposal (1993) The Way We Were (1973)
Robert Redford and Demi Moore Barbara Streisand and Robert Redford
Jungle Fever (1991) Untamed Heart (1993)
Wesley Snipes and Anna Sciorra Christian Slater and Marisa Tomei
Love Jones (1997) When a Man Loves a Woman (1994)
Larenz Tate and Nia Long Meg Ryan and Andy Garcia
Love Story (1970) Who’s Afraid of Virginia Woolf? (1966)
Ali MacGraw and Ryan O’Neal Elizabeth Taylor and Richard Burton
Made for Each Other (1939) With Six You Get Eggroll (1968)
Carol Lombard and Jimmy Stewart Doris Day and Brian Keith
Mississippi Masala (1991) Yours, Mine and Ours (1968)
Denzel Washington and Sarita Choudhury Henry Fonda and Lucille Ball
Move Over, Darling (1963)
Doris Day and James Garner

Additional Movies

American Beauty (1999) Obsessed (2009)
Kevin Spacey and Annette Bening Beyoncé Knowles and Idris Elba
Anger Management (2003) Something’s Gotta Give (2003)
Jack Nicholson and Adam Sandler Jack Nicholson and Diane Keaton
Autumn in New York (2000) Surviving Christmas (2004)
Richard Gere and Winona Ryder Ben Affleck and Christina Applegate
Bee Season (2005) Sweet Home Alabama (2002)
Richard Gere and Juliette Binoche Reese Witherspoon and Patrick Dempsey
Before Sunset (2004) Sweet November (2001)
Ethan Hawke and Julie Delpy Keanu Reeves and Charlize Theron
Blue valentine (2010) Terms of Endearment (1983)
Ryan Gosling and Michelle Williams Shirley MacLaine and Debra Winger
Coal Miner’s Daughter (1980) The Five-year Engagement (2012)
Sissy Spacek and Tommy Lee Jones Jason Segel and Emily Blunt
Couples Retreat (2009) The Back-up Plan (2010)
Vince Vaughn and Malin Akerman Jennifer Lopez and Alex O’Loughlin
Crooklyn (1994) The Big Wedding (2013)
Alfre Woodard and Delroy Lindo Robert De Niro and Diane Keaton
Date Night (2010) The Bounty Hunter (2010)
Steve Carell and Tina Fey Jennifer Aniston and Gerald Butler
Deliver Us From Eva (2003) The Break-up (2006)
Gabrielle Union and LL Cool J Jennifer Aniston and Vince Vaughn
Devil Wears Prada (2006) The Campaign (2012)
Anne Hathaway and Meryl Streep Will Ferrell and Zach Galifianakis
The Devil’s Advocate (1997) The Door in the Floor (2004)
Keanu Reeves and Charlize Theron Jeff Bridges and Kim Basinger
The Family Man (2000) The Glass House (2001)
Nicolas Cage and Téa Leoni Diane Lane and Leelee Sobieski
Fatal Attraction (1987) The Good Girl (2002)
Michael Douglas and Glenn Close Jennifer Aniston and Jake Gyllenhaal
Father of the bride (1991) The Horse Whisperer (1998)
Steve Martin and Diane Keaton Robert Redford and Kristin Scott Thomas
Fool’s Gold (2008) The Marriage Chronicles (2012)
Matthew McConaughey and Kate Hudson Jazsmin Lewis and Darrin Dewitt Henson
Four Christmases (2008) The Mirror Has Two Faces (1996)
Reese Witherspoon and Vince Vaughn Barbra Streisand and Jeff Bridges
Her (2013) The Money Pit (1986)
Joaquin Phoenix and Amy Adams Tom Hanks and Shelley Long
Hope Springs (2012) The Notebook (2004)
Meryl Streep and Tommy Lee Jones Ryan Gosling and Rachel McAdams
It’s Complicated,(2009) The Story of Us (1999)
Meryl Streep and Steve Martin Bruce Willis and Michelle Pfeiffer
Julie & Julia (2009) Think Like a Man (2012)
Amy Adams and Meryl Streep Chris Brown and Gabrielle Union
Jumping the Broom (2011) True Lies (1994)
Paula Patton and Laz Alonso Arnold Schwarzenegger and Jamie Lee Curtis
Just Married (2003) Unfaithful (2002)
Ashton Kutcher and Brittany Murphy Richard Gere and Diane Lane
Life as we know it (2010) Waiting to Exhale (1995)
Katherine Heigl and Josh Duhamel Whitney Houston and Angela Bassett
Longtime Companion (1989) Wanderlust (2012)
Stephen Caffrey and Patrick Cassidy Jennifer Aniston and Paul Rudd
Love and other drugs (2010) What Lies Beneath (2000)
Jake Gyllenhaal and Anne Hathaway Harrison Ford and Michelle Pfeiffer
Marley and Me (2008) When a man loves a woman (1994)
Owen Wilson and Jennifer Aniston Meg Ryan and Andy Garcia
Meet the Fockers (2004) Why did I get married? (2007)
Ben Stiller and Robert De Niro Tyler Perry and Janet Jackson
Monster-in-law (2005) You, Me and Dupre (2006)
Jennifer Lopez and Michael Vartan Kate Hudson and Owen Wilson
Mr. & Mrs. Smith (2005) Don Jon (2013)
Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie Joseph Gordon-Levitt and Scarlett Johansson
Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind (2004) Before Midnight (2013)
Jim Carrey and Kate Winslet Ethan Hawke and Julie Delpy
The Best Man Holiday (2013) This Is 40 (2012)
Monica Calhoun and Morris Chestnut Paul Rudd and Leslie Mann

After watching the films, the couple then go through a series of questions as follows:

1. What was the main relationship portrayed in the movie? This is the relationship that you will focus on in the following questions.

2. What main problem(s) did this couple face? Are any of these similar to the problems that the two of you have faced or might face as a couple?

3. Did this couple strive to understand each other? Did they tend to accept one another, even if they were very different? Or did the couple tend to attack each others’ differences?
– In what way was this relationship similar to or different from your own relationship in this area?

4. Did the couple have a strong friendship with each other? Were they able to support each other through bad moods, stressful days, and hard times? Did they listen to each other like good friends? Did the couple in the movie do considerate or affectionate things for each other?
– In what way was this relationship similar to or different from your own relationship in this area?

5. How did the couple handle arguments or differences of opinion? Were they able to open up and tell each other how they really felt, or did they tend to just snap at each other with anger? Did they try using humor to keep things from getting nasty? Did it feel like they were really trying to understand each other?
– In what way was this relationship similar to or different from your own relationship in this area?

—————–
Sources:
Article at:
http://www.spring.org.uk/2014/02/10-psychology-studies-every-lover-should-know.php
http://www.spring.org.uk/2013/07/the-four-things-that-kill-a-relationship-stone-dead.php

Dr. Ron Rogge – Associate Professor in the Department of Clinical and Social Sciences in Psychology at the University of Rochester
http://www.courses.rochester.edu/surveys/funk/